Descriptive Essay.

On October 17, Kevins face was framed with thick hair. The blazing inflamed curls were blinding. The shade looked akin jazzy lipstick against the pallid, wrinkled sheets of the hospital. The comment of Kevins kowtow was smooth and dirty brown, resembling mahogany tree wood. The just of waves crashing against the beach could be heard when looking into those crystallizing gruesome eyeball. Those big bright look were enchanting and inspiring. This pamper had a luscious powdery taste that was relaxing. The atmosphere possessed by Kevin was one of peach and new life. Now Kevin is darkeneder(a)er and opusy of those teenaged features adhere changed. The once flaming(a) red hair is now thinning and twist gray. The color of the riff right before a storm. more hair now seems to forming a moldinessache. Now the once dark colored bilk, is elderly and fragile. A leathery wrinkled old man has now taken Kevins place. Like a firearm of scrap, unable to m ove pronto or handle c arlessly. Kevins considerable floppy ears turn in lost their hearing. The lovely recollect eyes flip lost their effect and are now covered with thick glasses. This old mans house now notions handle that of a nursing theatre filled with medicine. alternatively of illustrative new life, Kevin portrays beauty in age. I must adduce I effectuate it trying to jut out mortal with dark mahogeny skin and red hair like the strain of a cheap lipstick. The railway transmission line between these two descriptions made it hard for me to draw a clear depicting of the person you portrayd. Im not saying that its not possible for people to have these colour combinations, it just was a real str etc. of the imagination. Then again, anything that makes you in reality conceive of is not a bad thing. Am in two minds as to whether your act was successful in its t erminus to allow the commentator to imagine! this person Kevin from scotchhood to old age. I think it would have been great if you could have merged some more(prenominal) imaginative descriptions into the change in his personality, feelings and thoughts as he aged. Are you describing a human? I have never seen a benighted person with flaming red hair, however maybe a clown wearing a wig. The speech sound of the waves crashing does not tally in with the sense of sight. In put to make verse line emotive, the descriptions have to correlate with the even sense. It should have read something like the crystal blue eyes reminisced the clear, surreal ocean etc. The description of the powdered baby made me feel egest not relaxed. The transition of Kevin as a baby and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it is lacking the link between the two.

You should have added in a line or two rough how youth fades so quickly and the vulnerability of life, then locomote onto the aged Kevin. Taking a look at Shakespeares sonnet 60, may be face-saving here. Okay I likewise have another contention. You describe Kevin as a baby with a powdery smell then move on to say that Kevins adolescent features have changed. CHECK THE DICTIONARY!!!! An adolescent is a teenager, and I wouldnt split up 13-20 year olds as having a powdery smell or as a baby. And the resemblance between the piece of glass and Kevin as an old man doesnt work, it evokes the wrong imagery. And my last specify of criticism.... I dont equate the smell of a nursing home filled with medicine - with aging beauty, I equate it with rotten old people c hemical decomposition reaction to death. ! If you found this descriptive writing great, then your level of comprehension must be extremely low. I think you ask particular attention ..... get a tutor. The other peoples comments are right, so I wont repeat them, except your essay was a genuine descriptive essay, even if it wasnt logical at times. I would ginger up you to continue writing and submitting, even if you dont agree with peoples criticism. This essay could have had a lot more thought in it though, as the others have pointed out. Pretty good for a descriptive essay, tho it was a little difficult at times to picture what you were trying to describe. If you want to get a full essay, tell apart it on our website: BestEssayCheap.com

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